Saturday, February 09, 2013

The Web We Call Dating Revisited

One of my favorite posts I've ever written was titled The Web We Call Dating.  I really wanted to write a sequel including more of my experiences that I've had since then.  The sequel is never as good as the first.  I might write it one day, but instead I want to analyze it a bit.

Today I had a thought.  I think that dating is like watching sports for angels.  Can't you just imagine them as they watch us?  The guy gets ready to ask out the girl.  The angels are on the edge of their seats.  Can he do it?  Will he be intercepted?  The guy knocks on the door.  He panics.  He runs away. The angels are shouting in disappointment!  Or he doesn't run away.  He meets the girl and asks.  She says yes. Then an angel jumps up and yells "Touchdown!"

Of course, not all games are clean.  Some players are brutal against the opposing team.  Some cheat as well.  Can't you hear the angels shouting, "That was uncalled for!"  "What a jerk!"  "Red card him!"  "Get him off the field!"

I'm sure that when a guy proposes to a girl and the girl says yes, that's like the end of a game when everyone jumps up, cheers, and hugs each other as violently as possible.

And not all marriages are good. When a good person says yes to someone whose not temple worthy and has no desire to let the other be temple worthy, I'm sure the angels' heads hang low as though their team had just lost.

I'm quite positive that they find us entertaining at least a little.

See, dating is hard.  It's fun.  But it's hard.  Some people manage to find their one and only early in life. Others struggle everywhere they go trying to find someone who is good for them as well as someone they can be good for.  You can't hate people when things don't work out.  A lot won't work out.  That's the name of the game.  Beginnings of relationships are based on shallowness and a lack of information. Well, and other relationships begin with sacrifices and/or faith - both blind and not blind.  No guy who has ever rejected me thought in his heart, "I hope she never finds love."  (At least, I don't think anyone ever thought that).  There's no malice.  It just wasn't right for him.

I firmly believe that I could have been good for some of the guys that I've felt rejected by.  You know what, that's okay.  The biggest point of this earth is to use our agency.  I may have been good for him, but he didn't choose me.  Along those same lines, I know there have been guys that I have rejected only to find out once I'd past the point of no return that he was worthy of me.  That's okay.  My eternity is not over because I judged someone harshly.  There will be another guy for me just as there was/ will be another girl for him.

I hate the ups and downs of dating.  Well, I like the ups.  When I go down, however, I begin to wonder if it would be better to never know the up so that it would hurt less going down.  I know its good for me, but I don't enjoy feeling like a negative value.  It's hard to feel up-beat when the guy you were looking at turns away.  I guess its more practice in being Christlike.  You can learn to love him enough to wish the best for him even if he doesn't choose you.

So, I ask myself, what is the point of this essay?  I think what I'm trying to say is I am a girl.  I think too much.  I see a handsome face and my stomach churns.  And then nothing happens.  I'm trying to remind myself that it's okay to love people even if they don't love you back.  It's okay to have friends who will only ever be friends.  One day things will change.

Tuesday, February 05, 2013

Ooh, she's old. Let's Get Her Married!

My roommates had a lot of fun telling me I'm old now that I'm 26. 

Sunday night one of my roommates started asking me a ton of questions.  I thought that it was some sort of personality questionnaire.  So I kept answering them.  Well, the questions continued.  Then one of the questions was, "What's your favorite scripture?"  I answered and then furrowed my brow.  What kind of personality question is that?  Yikes!  She's setting up a profile for me!  

Sure enough, yesterday I received several emails from  So there you go.  I probably should have thought more before giving the answers I gave.