Friday, May 25, 2012

Up and Down

Life is a roller coaster.  We go up and we go down.  Up and down.  Up and down.  Up and down.

I like a boy.  I think it through.  He can't possibly like me.  It's over.  It will never happen.  I forget to keep thinking logically.  I like boy again.

Up and down.

I like a different boy (gasp).  I think it through.  He can't possibly like me.  He's really cute though.  I don't really like boy.  I just want the first boy to like me.  Since he can't possibly like me, I want someone else to so that I don't have to think about boy 1 anymore.

Up and down.

The DVD works.  It pauses.  It works.  It pauses.  Should I keep waiting for the DVD to work?  Or should I give up and watch a different movie?  Or do something else with my time?  (The DVD was in Russian, so it's not like it was a waste of time in the first place.  It was going to be my language study).

Up and down.

Once upon a time a boy was like a Russian DVD.  Sometimes I like it (him).  Sometimes I don't.  Sometimes I want to blame it (him) for ruining my computer (life...okay not life...moment maybe?).  Sometimes I recognize that that's an unfair accusation and I have no proof to go on.  Sometimes I'm stuck looking at a frozen screen wondering if I should wait or move on.

I'm tired of going up and down.  I'm feeling a little sick of the ride.

Up and down.  Up and down.  Up and down.

Friday, May 04, 2012

It's Officially Over

I talked to James today.  Golly Wally, I love that guy.  We talked for a long time.  He's so fun to talk to, even when he's telling me that we're not more than friends.  At least we are friends.  I could say good things about him all day long.  

Many people don't stay friends with people who break up with them.  James has stayed friends with all his past girlfriends.  I'm pretty sure there's something to that.  The problem isn't being with him.  I love being around him.  The problem happens when I get home I realize that he's not mine anymore.  

Anyway, this is a post saying that I've come out of limbo.  I'm single.  I'm just as awkward as ever.  I am sad, but I've had a week to prepare myself for this moment.  

So it's over.