Monday, October 31, 2011

Go Away You Creep

Some people are thin. Some people are not. Some people are ninjas. Some people can't help but notice the floor creeks every time they walk around. Some people like to hide. Some people feel like they can't hide because they stick out wherever they go.

I feel like the word creepy has entered my vocabulary too much lately. It starts out as a joke. "Don't worry, I'm just creepily watching you," I say to my roommate facetiously. However, the more that vile word comes out of my mouth the more I start feeling like a creep. "Now I'm going to go creepily stalk someone." Stalking is another of those words that come out of my mouth too much.

Now I am well aware of the fact that most people probably don't think of me as creepy. Or at least I don't think people do. There's just something about repetition that gets in the brain. I want it to stop. I don't want to be creepy anymore. So, to combat this repulsive feeling, I've decided I'm going to put on a different word. Enigmatic. "Don't worry, I'm just enigmatically watching you." Exactly! The phrase doesn't make sense which means the word enigmatically fits perfectly!

So say goodbye to Rie the Creep and say hello to Rie the Enigma.

Everyone's an enigma. I'm not trying to say I'm especially puzzling. I'm just trying to get away from this rotten feeling that's trying to overcome me. I'm above this!

By the way, Happy Halloween.

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Blogger Stats

I'm obviously not doing homework. One day I'll be a better student. Hmm, or maybe not. I guess chances are good that I will graduate in much the same condition I am right now. Anyway, not important.

So, every once in a while (all the time) I will do useless things online in order to avoid doing homework. One such thing would be to get on blogger and check out my blogger stats. It still kind of amuses me that my blog is referenced on the Mormon Mission World website. I don't know how it got there. It obviously happened when I was on a mission, but I'm no longer on a mission.

Now, someone who is tech savvy should enlighten me because I am definitely puzzled at what I saw today. The referring site of the day was none other that Baby Gear Strollers. How on earth does someone look up strollers and wind up at my blog? Well, now they could because I'm posting about it; but before this post how did this happen?

After you're done explaining that, explain one more thing to me. So before my mission I signed up for google analytics on my blog. When I came back from my mission, blogger added blogger stats to dashboard. Basically they both tell me the same information (except they don't). As in they both tell me how many people visit my blog and where they are from. (Google analytics will tell me the actual city whereas blogger stat just tells me the country). Here's the question. Why does blogger stat tell me that four people visited my blog yesterday while analytics tells me that no one visited my blog yesterday? Are there ghosts that only stats picks up? Does it make it up to make me feel better. Stats: "Oh look how popular you are!" Analytics: "Nobody likes you. Your blog is a waste of space on the internet!" Who do I believe?

Also interesting, Analytics seems to think that Brazil likes my blog second to the US with only two other countries in competition. Stats doesn't mention Brazil at all, but it does mention eight other countries. Methinks both cannot be completely accurate.

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Always Be Prepared

If you were wondering why all the missionaries decided to leave the MTC campus at the same time, it was because we had a fire drill. My supervisor whispered to me that there would be a fire drill, so I got the impression that we weren't supposed to tell the missionaries.

Well, at the MTC missionaries have different schedules. We were supposed to have the fire drill last week, but it didn't happen. Last week my coworker cousin told the service assigned missionaries to go tell all the sisters in the bathrooms that we were closing them and they shouldn't take showers. I wish I was that tactful. No one was in the showers on the fourth floor. So I went to third. One bathroom was empty. The other had sisters who were just entering the showers. I told them now was not the best time. "Can we use the other bathroom." "No." "Can we use the fourth floor." "No." "Is there something wrong with the water." I cracked. "No but in ten minutes there will be a fire drill." Some decided to leave, others decided they could take a quick shower.

I went back to the fourth floor. My supervisor took my radio and gave it to Josh. I was a little taken aback by that. Then I went to find my cousin to determine which floor we would be in charge of. Because there were sisters showering on third, I got sent back there.

Well, when I went back to the shower that had had sisters, I was relieved to find they were all out. Whew, I can breathe. I then went to the other bathroom that had been empty. It wasn't empty anymore. "Sisters," there was urgency in my voice. "Now would be a great time to get out of the showers." Silence. "Please!" I didn't really know what to say. "Okay," came a confused, probably slightly irritated voice. Five seconds later the alarm went off.

I started my task of knocking on doors. If people were in them, I instructed them as to where the meeting spot was. I circled the entire floor, swept the bathrooms, and finished at the door of the sisters who had previously been in the showers (I found there room as I was circling, but they obviously weren't dressed yet). As they were the last ones on my floor, I waited for them. As we were heading down the stairs, we saw that there were some elders running along the street in their towels. I think that made the sisters feel better that they weren't the only ones who had been caught in the shower.

Anyway, that was my excitement for the morning.

Saturday, October 15, 2011


The sun is shining! Sometimes it seems like when it rains, it pours. The same is true for blessings. There just seems to be moments in life that keep getting better as the day progresses.

Yesterday I left the testing center not feeling like a failure and I had a glimmer of hope that I really am cut out for my major. This morning I talked to my sister. We're going to hang out later today. Anyway, talking with her got me really excited for life. It's moments like these that I need to hang onto because I know the storm is approaching. Storms always come back, but we can be ready for them.

I am so grateful to have the gospel in my life. I'm grateful for the peace that comes when you've poured your whole heart out to Heavenly Father. I'm grateful for His love.

The sun is shining today. It's an outward visual of how my heart feels.

Facebook, Missions, Toilet

Last night I went to an awesome Facebook party. Seriously. My hats go off to all those who planned it. Yes I said hats, as in plural, as in all of them. How many hats do I have? Here? Probably none. But the statement implies that if I had a hat it would go off to them.

There was only one downside to the party. My subconscious decided it didn't get enough facebook and it decided to pester me all night. You know those dreams where nothing happens but you find yourself thinking the same thing over and over again? Facebook, chatting, message, poke, Youtube, facebook, facebook, facebook. The words just kept flashing over and over again.

I did have one dream that was an actual dream worth telling. Don't worry, I'm pretty sure the topic everyone was speaking about was facebook, so it was still facebook related. Anway, last night I had the opportunity to think a lot about my mission. So in my dream an ex-missionary decided that everyone in the MTC needed popcorn. So he cooked enough popcorn for everyone and the floor. Yes the floor. As in there was popcorn all up and down the hallways of the MTC. And I got to clean it up. There was no popcorn last night. What does this mean?

Toilets. They're very useful. They are most useful when they are working correctly.

WARNING: if you are easily grossed out you are free to quit reading right now. Yes I said right now. Yes I know you're always free to quit reading at any time, but I am giving you special permission right now. (I might be writing this very early in the morning. My brain may not be working properly because it has only been thinking about Facebook all night).

Last night someone decided to leave a present in the toilet bowl. I shrugged it off and went to bed. People should learn to clean up their own messes. This morning it was still there. I decided I should probably fix it. So I pushed the handle to flush it. Oh, I get it, the handle's not working. Well, that doesn't stop me. So I did what any good girl would do and I took of the back part and flushed it with the chainy thingy. I was gonna fix it, but I think it's broken. So I guess I'll leave that for maintenance. Or I'll try again later if I feel like it. I'll scotch tape it! 'Cause that'll work.

Anyway, I really wanted to put up a sign that says, "If you can't flush it, don't use it." Yes, it's really early and I'm probably not thinking clearly. Thanks for joining me this bright and sunshiny morning even if the sun won't shine for a few more hours. Anyway, my main point in telling you this is because I don't want to become the resident toilet flusher. Please. Because by writing this on my blog, somehow the force will get involved and I'll be excused from that job.

Welp, I'm off to work. I hope I don't find popcorn everywhere.

Thursday, October 13, 2011


"Ma'am, can you please describe what your attacker looked like." I hesitated. "He was than me." I scrunched my face. "It was dark, I don't remember." "Dark?" the police officer asked skeptically. "I thought you said this happened at noon." "Yes, he was dark. As in he had dark hair and dark clothes...or at least they weren't bright."

So a fear that I have is that one day I'm going to need to describe someone and I won't be able to. People ask me all the time, "What does he/she look like?" I never know what to say, so they try to prompt me. "What color of hair does this person have?" "Red, no blonde, no light brown. Maybe it was reddish." "Does this person have glasses?" "No," I respond when in fact that person does. "Is this person tall?" "Everyone is taller than me so yes."

The problem is that I don't notice things. It's not that I don't have the capacity, it's that frankly I just don't pay attention. Every once in a while when I'm walking along I will exercise my brain by noting what everyone I see is wearing. I've tried to make it habit, but it just doesn't stick.

The same thing is true for eyes. For the longest time I just never looked there. I mean I would look at people when they speak to me, but I wouldn't concentrate on their eyes. That's gonna change though because eyes are fascinating! So please don't get creeped out if I start staring you all in the eyes.

Saturday, October 08, 2011

BYU Homecoming Parade

I've been accused of not putting pictures up on my blog. It's true. I don't.

Today was the BYU homecoming parade. I do custodial work. That puts me as apart of Student Auxiliary Services. That's SAS for short. That is not to be confused with SAS the statistics program class that I am currently in. Yep, that's right, I've got the label SAS on me in two ways. Something is telling me I need to learn to be more sassy. Ahem. Back to the topic at hand. So about a month ago my boss asked us if we wanted to be in the parade. We said yes. Then half of us didn't show up. (Lame). Our float was based on the pioneers. And you want to see pictures.

This was our float.

This is me and my cousin Annie. We work together.

I didn't take many pictures of other floats. BYU Recycling had this animal that looked like it wanted to eat me. And it has a cool torch. So, here you go.

I pet a llama every chance I get. Notice the wannabe bonnet is trying to creep into my eyes and blind me. Also notice that the llama doesn't seem pleased with the idea of me petting him.

Tuesday, October 04, 2011

Letters to Missionaries

Once upon a time I was roaming the 3rd floor hallway. To my astonishment I saw a mattress lying there. Well, mattresses should not be taken off their beds. So I opened a room and found that my guess was right and there was a mattress missing from that room. They were using the mattressless bed as storage for other things. Not wanting to move around their stuff, I promptly put a note on their door.

Dear Sisters,
You need to put the mattress back on the bed. It can't stay here. Thanks. ~17M custodial crew

The response:
It has a nasty stain and right to be replaced or cleaned. No one wants to use a mattress with a large mysterious and suspicious yellow stains. bui budul?
Thanks for you help!

My response:
Oh go cry me a river. Did you notice your call letters that said you were going to Bulgaria and Poland? The mattresses you will see there will be far worse. As for your rights: by becoming a missionary you gave up a lot of rights. You are missionaries. You can't afford to be picky. If I could I would gladly take this nice mattress and replace it with the one I'm currently sleeping on. Be grateful for what you have.

Okay, that's not even what I would have written. How about this:

Dear Sisters,
I don't think you understood. Either you put the mattress back on the bed under your terms or we will move your things off the bed so that we can put the mattress back in its spot. We don't have extra mattresses and these types of stains don't come out. Live with it.
Love, 17 M custodial crew

Really, though, my boss suggested we just switch out the mattress with an early arrival mattress. We make the beds for early arrivals so they will never see it anyway. I don't have to be unfeeling. I don't get to be jerk. Darn.

Saturday, October 01, 2011

A Little Here, A Little There

This has been a day for learning for me and the day's not half gone. As most (if not all) of you know, today was the first day of General Conference. On my mission I learned the value of coming to General Conference with a question. Our home teachers also challenged us to do so. So I did. None of the speakers answered it thus far, but as the choir was singing I realized I had my answer.

The great thing about life is that even though there are monumental occasions to learn from, there are also insignificant moments that can teach us as well. Before the conference started, I looked back at the last notes that I had written in my booklet. I really need to look over my notes more often and I discovered other treasures there that could help me if I applied them.

Completely unrelated to conference, an action of a friend sent me to go scouring my email for something. I haven't found it yet, but I found something else. I want to share it with you. At the beginning of 2007 a guy in my ward gave a talk in which he gave us a list of ten things we could do to get the most out of the ward. Here's the list:
1. Love notes
2. Home teaching/visiting teaching
3. Activities
4. Service
5. Invite
6. FHE
7. Never let anyone stand alone
8. Visit people
9. Know people’s names

I know I could definitely work on some of those. Part of me feels guilt that the things I'm committed to changing didn't come from General Conference. (Don't worry though, I still have three more sessions to go). The great thing is that the spirit of General Conference has put me in the right circumstance to be accepting of ways to change. Sometimes it doesn't matter who it is that tells us something as long as that something comes from God.

I'll probably post again soon about General Conference. The main message of this post was the little treasures that we can find when we're trying to do what's right. They don't always come in ways we expect, but that doesn't undermine their importance.